Thursday, October 7, 2010

Saturn in Libra: Pain, Possibility and Paradox

Saturn’s in Libra till February, 2012, but today October 7th, there’s a New Moon in Libra: the Sun and Moon are conjoined at the same degree and the “Reality Cop, Mr. Transiting Saturn” has just joined them---what a powerful “Call” that is to getting our relationships right! No blaming or shaming allowed, just do what needs to be done and make an attitude adjustment. I wish it was as easy as planting a potent seed.

In this “New Moon/Dark of the Moon” we are advised by the Farmer’s Almanac to “plant the new seeds.” Astrologers also remind us to plant our “new intentions like seeds” at the New Moon and not to disturb the seeds as the New Moon waxes towards the Full Moon. Then we see what we have planted. At Full Moons we can see clearly, sometimes get an epiphany/aha! Moment, and sometimes we feel “crushed” that the seeds didn’t germinate.

With serious Saturn being in “fair minded Libra”-- the sign of the weighing scales-- we often forget how unbalanced the process of weighing and balancing really is—! It’s been said that Libra holds more stress internally than any other sign, and is more like a finely tuned violin than a balanced symphony. Libra holds the tension of the opposites, and tries to do it with poise, but seldom do people know that the pressure of holding opposites, paradoxes, and ambivalence takes a great psychic toll. We all have Libra in our charts somewhere, and with Saturn in Libra for all of us now, we will collectively feel this pressure.

At this New Moon I’ve decided to plant the seed of hope for reconciliation between the three of us: me, Sophie, and Alistair. Writing about this in the journal helps do this, but I’m hoping that I can find some symbolic act, or ritual, that will indeed plant this seed. Do I dare talk this way to Sophie? Can we find a bridge between her Christian fundamentalism and my astrology? Does she even want to bring us closer, or is she still holding the pain and resentment of my leaving her Dad?

I know I will send something of this journal entry as an email to Kendra… should I mention the “gift of insight” this Saturn in Libra time has given me….? Does she know already know how I see both her and Sophie similarly? --and that I’m hoping that Sophie will someday see me in the same light as Kendra does? I don’t want Kendra to see herself as a substitute daughter, but I now see my yearning for closeness with Sophie…is this possible between mothers and daughters? Sad that it took the near-drowning of Sophie in Lindisfarne to make me realize how much I love her.

Ah…the mentor relationship with Kendra is so much easier, less emotional. Sophie and Kendra are about the same age, although Sophie has an Aries Sun not a Scorpio Sun, and she has an Aquarius Moon instead of Kendra’s Cancer Moon. The Aquarius part of Sophie can see the larger picture and be more detached at times, but Sophie’s Aries Sun will spur her on to doing things she thinks she cannot do—it will test her, and give her courage in the process. Her firey Aries Sun and airy Aquarius Moon are so different than Kendra’s watery Scorpio Sun and Moon. And me: an air-sign Libra with a fiery Aries Moon. Hah! Strange to think how Sophie and I have what astrologers call “the natural compatibilityof the Sun of one person matching the Moon of the other”…but….she is so very much her own person, and I am too…and that’s how it should be. Saturn in Libra though, is calling for bridges to be made.

So here we are--Sophie and I on the train to Zurich. She’s silently reading a book about Celtic Spirituality and I’m journaling on my computer, wondering how much of this to send to Kendra…and what Sophie and I can do to plant the seed of reconnection. Ah…she just put down her book; better turn this off--

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