Monday, September 13, 2010
Journal, Sept 15
A woman from a British hospital in "Berwick-on-Tweed" called late last night about my Sophie. Apparently, Sophie had gone on “pilgrimage” to the holy island of Lindisfarne—which she’d never really told me about—! I had no idea that her dream to walk ‘through the waters’ meant crossing dangerous undertows of incredibly fast tides! I had no idea she planned to walk at night, by herself through the waters—it was a New Moon last night, and it must have been very dark. I still don’t know if she knew how many “pilgrims” died this way; people like her who don't swim, and get caught in the undertow.
Was she risking all for God? Was she depressed? Manic? Suicidal or---“enraptured”? She has Uranus squareing her Sun, Mercury and Mars--but I don't care if the symbolism is right on, she could have played it out differently! Was it Uranian recklessness? Astrology be damned! It doesn't matter what the aspects are--it doesn't help.
I’m leaving tomorrow….they said she had a concussion and was barely conscious by the time someone from the priory there found her, and pulled her out of the water—she had lashed herself by her belt to a pole that wasn’t that far from the island.
I feel so ashamed. Sophie.... a Christian fundamentalist; the ‘only daughter of an astrologer’—ah... I feel Sophie must feel ashamed of me. Why do these beliefs come between us? Why did she go there? Was she hoping to become more…..religious? I wonder if they contacted her father, Alistair—I can’t imagine seeing him again after five years….and meeting him this way.
I don't have time to write to Kendra...but I'll take my journal, and packing itself will help relieve the shock of this...I doubt if I can sleep. I need to leave here by four am to get the plane out of Boston. ~